Breaking Point
by Cupcake Fairy
Summary: Everyone breaks eventually. I remember getting told this a long time ago. At the time I just scoffed at them, raised my chin high, and claimed that I was strong and I would never break. That was before I met Booth. Second version.
1. Prologue

Everyone breaks eventually. I remember getting told this a long time ago. At the time I just scoffed at them, raised my chin high, and claimed that I was strong and I would never break. That was before I met Booth. Ever since my family left me I built walls around myself, not letting anyone get close enough to hurt me. I wrapped myself in my own cocoon and I admit I wasn't happy, but I was safe and content. Then Booth came in to my life and taught me to use my heart. He told me it was okay to feel, to love. Every moment I was in Booth's company, a brick in my inner walls would crumble. I never realized that I was letting myself feel until I felt pain.

When Booth was shot and declared dead I realized how much I depended on Booth, how much I needed him, and that scared me. From my teenage years I have been independent, looking after myself, knowing that I was alone. How could I grow such a strong bond without realizing it? I felt betrayed by my own body which felt hollow at the thought of having to get up every morning and live normally without hearing his voice, seeing his smile, feeling his soft touch and other things about him I took for granted. My heart felt raw and battered, and my mind wouldn't let me forget him.

Then he came back to life.

It was all a set-up, a coy to catch an underground criminal. Booth was alive and let me suffer for the two longest weeks of my life. Standing by his fake coffin, I remember the rage building up inside me, rage at him for leaving him, but also rage at myself for letting myself get in to such a state, for letting myself feel for him. I struck him. Not particularly hard but he fell to the ground, not expecting the blow. I saw hurt in his eyes but I just walked away. Isn't that what he did to me? I tried to lock my heart away again, but it was too late; my heart was already his, it always had been.

Everyone breaks eventually. Once I mocked this idea. But now, being so close to breaking myself, I am willing to accept that one day I will break. But it will be different from those two lonely weeks. He will be there to comfort me, to help me put myself back together. I accept this and I'm not afraid. As Booth once said everything happens eventually, and why should I fear something that is destined to come?


	2. Breaking Point

Pouting in front of the mirror, Temperance Brennan expertly applied her lipstick for the third time, simply because she had nothing else to do. She was the type of person that always needed to be busy, and this pointless waiting was boring her. Glancing down at her watch, she admitted he was only five minutes late, but continued pacing through her apartment. Briefly she wondered why she was so agitated and anxious. Maybe it was because she had only met James a few days ago and was now going on their first date. Maybe it was because he hadn't told her where he planned to take her. Maybe it was because he hadn't called to tell her he was going to be late, like Booth always did.

This last thought made her freeze on the spot, her eyes widening slightly, before she shook her head and began pacing again. Although Brennan didn't like to admit it to herself, recently she had started to compare men to her partner and close friend, Seeley Booth. When she first did it, she mentally scolded her, but the thoughts kept returning. Once she caught herself admiring someone's eyes because they were the exact same shade of brown as Booth's eyes. Of course they held none of the same warmth, the same kindness, the same...

The doorbell interrupted her thoughts and she smiled in relief as she walked quickly to the door. She looked through the peep hole, a habit drilled in to her by Booth, and then stepped back to open the door, revealing a very handsome man. Giving her a dazzling smile, he pressed some roses in to her hands with one hand while the other ran through his floppy dirty blond hair. "Hi, James. Let me put these in some water and then we can go," Brennan said, hurrying back in her kitchen. Quickly she found a vase, filled it with water, and placed the roses inside. For a moment she simply stood and admired them. They were beautiful red roses, full and healthy looking. She would have preferred daisies, her favourite flowers, but how would anyone be expected to know her favourite flowers? Again she mentally scolded herself as thoughts turned to Booth who once showed her how close they were by naming her favourite flowers and planet. Booth knew.

"You look beautiful," James said, breaking her thoughts as she locked the door. Brennan smiled, clearly slightly embarrassed and looked down at her dress. It was a simple black dress, not exactly tight, but it still showed her natural curves and ended just above the knees. She muttered a quick thank you, and after that the walk to the car was silent.

James surprised her by taking her to a well-known Italian restaurant. Throughout the meal he was sweet, humorous, kind and polite. He was a real gentleman, something most women would kill for, but for Brennan there was something missing, something that wasn't right and she couldn't quite put her finger on it.

Despite this, they had fun and they were laughing together, his arm slung over her shoulders, as they exited the restaurant. As Brennan leaned back in the passenger car seat, she let her mind wander, her eyes gazing out of the window without really seeing anything. She only started to become aware of her surroundings when she realized they had been in the car for too long. It only took ten minutes to get to her apartment from the restaurant and now they had been in the car for twenty minutes. Her brow creased in confusion as she looked over at James. "Where are we going?" she asked, her eyes flickered out of the window every now and then to see if she recognised her surroundings.

A little smirk spread across James' face at Brennan's cute confused face. "I thought we would go to a little bar I know. Do you mind?" Brennan relaxed back in to her seat, smiling, and shook her head. James let go a tiny sigh of relief before focusing back on the road. It just showed Brennan how talented, if not stupid, Booth was. When they were in the car together, Booth always drove and would often talk and bicker with her, use his mobile and try to read a case file on his lap, sometimes all at the same time.

Once again, Brennan mentally scolded herself and forced her mind to take in her surroundings, making detailed studies of the buildings and people they were passing, just so that her mind was busy and thoughts wouldn't wander to Booth. It was only then when she realized she recognised the streets. Gnawing on her lip, Brennan tried desperately to give a name to the long familiar street they were driving along, and why it was familiar in the first place.

She closed her eyes, something she tended to do when she really needed to concentrate, and let her memories engulf her. Consciously, Brennan still didn't know where she was, but it seemed her subconscious was well aware because her heart was suddenly pounding and it had become harder to breathe. An image flashed in her mind. It was only for a second, but Brennan couldn't forget the place, no matter how hard she tried. It was a small building, sounds of laughter and singing coming from within. The outside wall was lit up with the name of the bar.

"Checkerbox," Brennan whispered, just as James pulled in to a parking space outside the bar. Shutting off the engine, James turned to face her, a wide goofy grin plastered on his face. He didn't seem to be aware that his date's chest had constricted, stopping her heart and lungs from working properly.

"You know it?" he asked, still oblivious to Brennan's state. Not trusting her voice, she nodded before quickly getting out of the car, gulping in the fresh night air. Interpreting this move as eagerness, James joined her, linking his arm around her waist and guiding her inside. "I really like to come here. My friend sings here from time to time. How do you know it?"

They walked silently for a few seconds, Brennan not answering his question. Why was she having problems speaking? It scared her that her body was so out of control, and her legs locked of their own accord when they walked through the doorway. Her eyes darted around the room, her mind throwing her vivid images she would have preferred to suppress. She saw herself dancing on stage, her friends clapping and cheering for her. She saw Pam standing at the bar at the back, clutching her handbag. She saw Pam point the gun at her. She saw Booth jump up and fall to the ground, blood oozing from his chest.

"A case. My partner was shot here. He took a bullet meant for me," she whispered hoarsely, finally answering James' question. He finally looked at her properly and took in her mood. Her face was pale and she was shivering slightly. Her eyes were wide, and as he watched a single tear escaped and rolled down her cheek. Suddenly Brennan turned to him and said in a harsh voice, "I need to go home."

James just nodded, not sure what to say. Brennan was already walking ahead of him, picking up her pace the further she got as though she was trying to escape. When she reached the car she was practically running and impatiently tugging on the car door which was still locked. She looked at him, who was still a distance away, with pleading eyes and unlocked it using the remote key. In a flash she was inside. When he clambered in, she was looking out of her window, hiding her face. Now her body was shaking, and her hands were clasped firmly together in her lap. Sighing, James pulled away and remained absolutely silent for the drive, while Brennan fought back the sobs that were threatening to engulf her.

They arrived outside Brennan's apartment complex just a few minutes later. James had broken speed limits in several places but he couldn't deal with a crying woman. His plan was to get her home as quickly as possible, maybe kiss her cheek goodnight in the car, and then drive as soon as she was out, not bothering to watch her walk to her door.

"Goodnight, Temperance," he said firmly, showing that he had no intention of leaving the car. Lucky for him she didn't argue or looked offended. Instead she returned the farewell, staying still while he leaned over to kiss her cheek. She sat in the car for a second, trying to remember how to work her legs, and with an embarrassed smile she was gone and heading to the apartment.

She heard his car leave before she had even reached the door and she was glad. Brennan didn't want for him to see her tears, to see her weak and vulnerable. Only one man has ever since her so vulnerable, and that was Booth. Halfway along the corridor, Brennan slipped her shoes off, convinced that she would fall over because her legs were shaking so much. Her hands were shaking too, and for a second she had a problem getting the key in the lock. In fact, everything was shaking.

Shutting the door behind her, Brennan shuffled over to her sofa and collapsed, burying her face in to the cushion. There she was attacked by the memories. She screwed up her eyes, but that only made the images clearer, the images she had worked so hard to forget. Now they were coming at her, all at once, without mercy, and she finally broke. Hugging her knees to her chest, Brennan cried, muffling her sobs in to her cushion.


	3. Missing

The next morning, Booth walked in to Brennan's office carrying two cups of coffee. He stopped short seeing the room was dark and empty and he frowned, looking over his shoulder. Spotting Angela walking towards the platform, he quickly caught up to her. "Angela! Wait up!" he called after her, causing her to turn around and smile.

"Hey, Booth," she said, slowing her pace, letting him catch up so they now walked side by side. "Ooh, coffee." She went to grab a cup and then frowned, "Damn, no drinks allowed on the platform." She nodded her head in the direction they were walking, and Booth quick deposited the coffee cups on a bench before walking up the steps.

"You seen Bones?" Booth asked, looking down at the bones lying on the examination table which Clark was carefully packing in a box. These bones were the only things that remained of Julie Taylor, a young girl who had been missing for a month. Yesterday, they had finally solved the case and now Clark was putting her to rest.

"She isn't with you?" Booth looked up to see Angela frowning, her arms crossed over her chest. Shaking his head, Booth looked around at the sound of the security beep, hoping it was the missing Brennan, but is was only Cam walking up the steps to join them.

"Booth. What are you doing here?" Cam asked as she headed over to the examination table to help Clark pack away the remains. After the box was sealed, she removed her gloves and turned to face Booth.

"Well I came over to work on the case paperwork with Bones but I can't find her. Have you seen her?" Booth asked.

"No, I haven't seen her, but she called this morning and said she couldn't come in to work," Cam explained, bending down to look at a monitor. When silence followed, she looked up to see Booth and Angela looking at her with stunned expressions. "What?" she asked, standing up straight and placing her hands on her hips.

"Brennan never stays off work," Angela said in disbelief.

"What if she was ill?" Cam asked, wondering why everyone was getting so worked up. Brennan must have taken sick days in the past.

"No. I've seen her come in when she could hardly stand up. There has to be something seriously wrong," Booth said. The three stood in silence, exchanging worried glances.

"What's up?" Hodgins asked curiously, his steps faltering as he walked in to a tense silence. He looked from each person, and finally, after nobody spoke, he nudged Angela with his elbow, prompting her. "What?"

"Um, Brennan is taking a day off," Angela finally answering, breaking out of her stunned reverie.

"No way! Seriously?" Hodgins' eyes widened in surprise and he looked at Cam for confirmation who nodded her head, folding her arms across her chest.

"I'm going to head over to her apartment," Booth said. After all he couldn't just sit around, and if he called her he predicted she wouldn't tell him anything. It seemed Angela had a similar thought because she frowned at his plan.

"She will just tell you that nothing is wrong and that she can look after herself," Angela said, rolling her eyes. Sometimes her friend was too independent for her own good.

"I'll take the paperwork with me, good enough excuse?" Booth asked and Angela paused, seemed to think about it, and then nodded. "Okay, I'll call you later." Angela smiled in appreciation, and when Booth descended the platform steps he heard her talking in worried whispers to Hodgins. If it was anyone else Booth wouldn't be worried, but his Bones never stayed off work, even when she was practically dying. Maybe he was exaggerating, but he was always overprotective of his partner.

Quickly sidetracking to her office, Booth gathered up the case notes before heading down to his car and driving to her compartment complex. On his way scenarios kept running through his head, gradually getting worse, taunting him. He was very tempted to turn on the sirens, but that would definitely be overreacting, and he scolded himself for putting such thoughts in his head. After all, she couldn't be that bad because she talked to Cam and she didn't suspect anything out of the ordinary.

Pulling up outside her compartment complex, Booth took two steps at a time, too impatient to bother waiting for the elevator. Stopping outside her apartment door, he took a steadying breath before knocking on her door, not stopping until he heard movement on the other side.

"Booth? What are you doing here?" She didn't even bother opening the door, something that alerted Booth's senses straight away. He held up the case file so she could see it through her peep hole and after a brief pause Booth heard the door getting unlocked, and a moment later Brennan opened the door just wide enough for her to look outside and hold her hand out. "Thanks for bringing it by," she said, not looking up to meet his eyes.

Booth didn't hand her the case file. Instead he just stared at her in shock for a second, taking in her appearance. Her skin was pale, except for blotches on her face and tear streaks down her cheeks. Hair was sticking up in all directions, appearing dull and unattended, and even though she wouldn't look at him, Booth could see that she had black rings of tiredness and red rings from crying.

When Booth made no move, Brennan briefly looked up at him and instantly regretted it, her eyes flickering away when she noticed the shocked and concerned expression on his face. Slightly waving the hand she held out, she said in a clearer voice, "Thanks for bringing the case file. I'll go work on it now."

Something told Booth to stay cool, to not freak out by her appearance, even though it hurt him seeing her upset and made him want to hunt down the cause of it. "I thought we could work on it together." Slowly she looked back up at his face and he could tell that she was thinking things over by the slight crease in her forehead. "We could order in some Thai food," he said, hoping to bribe her with the thought of food. He wondered when she last ate.

"Fine, just let me get changed," Brennan muttered, opening the door wider to let Booth walk through. Not bothering to shut the door, she hurried off in the direction of her bedroom, as though embarrassed to be seen by Booth in such a condition. For the first time he noticed she was wearing a flattering black dress. He knew she had a date last night. Did that creep do something to her? Rage flared inside him and he clenched his fists after shutting the door to stop himself from hitting the wall, something that he found himself doing when he lost control.

He remembered Bones and Zack telling him once to focus on the details to avoid emotional distress. Right, details, he could do that. Glancing around the room there was no evidence of an attack. Everything was in perfect condition as usual except for the couch where cushions and a blanket were splayed across it. So there was no physical attack. Unless it happened somewhere else. Somewhere like the bedroom... Okay, not a good idea to think like that.

Hearing her bedroom door open, he quickly spun round, flashing her a smile. Her appearance was slightly better now that her hair had obviously been brushed and her being in fresh clothes. Still, there were the tell-tale signs of distress etched in to her tired face and dull eyes.

"So," Booth said over enthusiastically, trying to get a positive response out of Brennan. "Where do you want to do this?" Clapping his hands together he looked around the room. At home he usual spread everything out on the floor but his apartment was cramped, meaning his furniture was small whereas Brennan had a big dining table. "Is the table good?"

"Sure," Brennan responded, taking a seat with a sigh before placing her elbow on the table and resting her cheek in her palm. His eyes always on her, Booth took a seat opposite, spreading out the case file.

"We could do this another time if something is up," Booth said gently, but this just made Brennan sit up, her jaw taunt, her eyes determined.

"Nothing is wrong," Brennan mumbled, reaching forward to grab the paperwork and started to fill it out. Booth watched her for a long time, noticing how she was slower than usual, pausing more often. Finally with a sigh, Booth silently joined in with the paperwork, knowing that she would talk to him eventually, all she needed was some time.


	4. Confession

About ten minutes in to silent paperwork, Booth noticed that Brennan was watching him. When he looked up she quickly averted her eyes, continuing her work. Booth ignored it, but it happened again five minutes later, and then three minutes after that, and then a minute after that. Finally Booth had enough of it. Something was bothering her partner and it hurt him to see her in such a state. He was also worried that her glances meant that he had something to do with it, and this made his heart ache uncomfortably.

Stopping his work, he gently placed down his pen. He knew that she was watching him out of the corner of her eye, but she continued working. Slowly he reached forward and rested his hand on top of hers, stilling it. "Temperance," he said calmly. When she didn't look up at him he used his other hand to raised her chin so their eyes locked.

"I never got over it," Brennan suddenly blurted out, and immediately she bit down on her lower lip and removed her hand and chin from his touch, lowering her face as though embarrassed by her sudden outburst.

For a second, Booth's brow just furrowed up in to confusion, but then he placed his finger under her chin again, gently raising it. "Got over what?" Booth prompted, his eyes soft and caring, making Brennan know that she could trust him with her deepest secret.

"You dying," she whispered, "I never got over it. I just suppressed my feeling until last night..." Trailing off she yanked out of his grip again, abruptly standing up, wrapping her arms around herself protectively.

So he was right. He had caused this but not in the way he first thought. Standing up, he silently wrapped his arms around her small frame, enveloping her in to an embrace that he hoped would make her realize how he felt about her. He loved her, and today he was going to tell her at long last. His heart ached at seeing her in such pain, and the fact that she was in such pain because of him dying made him hope that she felt the same way about him, even if she didn't know it yet.

She accepted his embrace, wrapping her own arms tightly around his body. For a long time they stood like that, until Booth leaned his head so his mouth was next to her ear. "What brought this on? I didn't know... I didn't realize... I should have seen..."

"Don't blame yourself, Booth," she said in the strongest voice he had heard her use all day. Lowering her eyes, Brennan sighed heavily before raising them back up slowly. "Last night my date took me to the Checkerbox. I just sort of... broke down. I know it is illogical but it just brought back so many memories and it hurt so much."

Booth could nodded in understanding as his partner buried her face in to his chest, as though trying to hide from the fears. But she couldn't hide from her fears. She had tried that and now look at her. "Hey, I understand. If I went back there I would have probably freaked out too."

Brennan looked up at him, raising a sceptical eyebrow that made her look like her old self, something that made Booth smile gently. "Really?"

"Sure. It was one of the most scariest days of my life." At this Brennan looked at him in confusion. Surely he had been through a lot more.

"But what about when you were in the army? You must have been scared for your life many times then," she said, tilting her head to the side as she tried to understand him. Booth just shook his head.

"Firstly, I said it was _one _of the scariest days. Secondly, it wasn't one of the scariest days because I was scared for my own life. It was because I was scared for yours. I couldn't imagine what my life would be like without you, and I'm so sorry that you had to go through that."

Fresh tears glittered in Brennan's eyes as she gave Booth a small sad smile. Leaning forward in to his chest again, he just heard her as she mumbled against her chest, "We're not just partners are we, Booth?"

"No. We're not," he said, his heart skipping a beat as Bones admitted to herself that there was something stronger between them. Placing his finger under her chin again, he raised her face up, swallowed nervously. "And we're not because I love you, Temperance Brennan. With all my heart."

With that Booth leaned his head forward so his lips lightly brushed against her, making both of them take in a sharp intake of breath. She closed the distant, and Booth knew as they shared a slow, sweet kiss, that she loved him too. She might not say it tonight, she might not ever say it, but as long as they could be together, Booth was happy.


	5. Promises

Hours later, and Booth and Brennan were curled up on the sofa, her head resting on his chest as he had his arm over her shoulder. They had spent the time exploring each other, but mainly they talked. Booth knew that for Brennan to finally leave his death in the past, they had to talk about it. So they did. They talked, and they talked, until they were empty of words and tears. That morning had been an emotional roller-coaster for Booth, consisting of: concern, anxiety, fear, shock, guilt, hope, love, joy and contentment. But it had all been worth it, he realized, as he held the most beautiful woman in his arms.

"Bones," he whispered, chuckling as her forehead wrinkled from being disturbed. A little while ago she had fell asleep, exhausted after staying up all night and the emotional beating she had. He had been content to just sit and watch her, but he had something he needed to say, no matter how stupid it was. "Bones," he repeated, and he smiled when she opened one eye, looking up at him with a mixture of being annoyed and curious. "What would you say if I asked you to marry me?" Okay, so he had only confessed his love a few hours ago. Then there was the fact that she didn't say it back. And then there was the fact that she never believed in marriage. But he had to try. It just felt so right.

Her eyes widened for a second before she took a deep breath. "I would say that you know how I feel about marriage, and tell you it better not be the only reason why you woke me up," she said, trying to lighten the matter. Still, she could see the hurt in Booth's eyes as his eyes flickered away from her face.

"Okay, so I won't ask." He tried to flash her one of his charm smiles, but it wasn't right, and even she could tell that he was hiding his emotions. Placing her palm gently on his cheek, she forced their eyes to meet, caressing his skin softly.

"I'm sorry I've hurt you, Booth, but you know I've always been against marriage." He flashed her another smile, this time more realistic than the first, and chuckled lowly, causing Brennan to raise a questioning eyebrow. "What?"

"I do know that your opposed to marriage, its just that I hoped that I might have changed your mind," he admitted, "But I guess I was just being stupid."

Brennan bit down on her lower lip, her eyes resting in her lap as she finally muttered, "I have to admit, I have become more open to the idea of marriage since meeting you." She looked up to find hopeful brown eyes, causing her to quickly say, "But I still believe I don't need a piece of paper to prove my commitment."

"But if I asked in the future, there might be a small chance you'll marry me?" Booth slowly asked, hardly daring to breath and trying not to get too hopeful. He watched as she seemed to think things over, a slight crease appearing in her forehead. Finally she turned her attention back to Booth.

"Possibly," she said. Booth grinned widely, leaning forward to gently brush his fingers down her neck as he kissed her exposed skin, making her breath hitch.

Pulling away his lips, he leaned his forehead against hers and said in a husky voice, "Promise?"

"As long as you promise you'll never leave me intentionally again," Brennan demanded, fastened her hands together behind his neck.

"I promise as as long you promise you'll never push me away on purpose," Booth said smirking, going along with the conversation.

"Then I promise that I'll try not to push you away, and that I might marry you in the future if you come up with a sufficient argument," Brennan said, laughing aloud at how silly they must sound.

"Good enough for me," Booth whispered huskily in her ear before capturing her mouth in a fiery kiss, ending all conversation.

_Fin._

_There it is then. I hope you enjoyed it, and please review. I might write a sequel after I've worked on my other fics for a bit, but tell me what you think. Thank you for reading!_


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